Mental Moment-Acknowledge How Far You’ve Come

Physical performance changes. You get good at one thing and add something else. You move into a different arena. You change your medium. Most of us are always learning something new, changing what we do or finding a new way to do what we already do that will add additional quality. Why wouldn’t mental skills be the same? Why wouldn’t you want to develop and continue to develop your mental skills to coincide with your physical skills. Athletes hire a coach to take them to the next level. Why wouldn’t you hire a mental training coach to help take you to the next level and the level after that?

Starting goals

One of my clients has come so far in adjusting his mental approach. It’s actually amazing how far he’s come in a relatively short amount of time! When we started working together his goal was to gain mental toughness so that he wasn’t as affected by his doubts, worries, lack of confidence, tension, etc. He has almost reach the pinnacle in these areas. He was starting to win some matches. Last week he was feeling pretty great about his mental game plan.

Shifting perspective

This week as I was talking to him about about his mental game plan he started to talk about lack of consistency and lack of confidence. I ask him why he was feeling inconsistent and lacking confidence particularly after another win (which he just started to experience again). He went on to say that although he was winning more matches they were easy wins. He didn’t feel like he was working hard.

In his last tournament my client who is a 3.5 was playing an opponent who is a 4.0 and won. I suggested to him that didn’t sound like an easy win particularly when he was playing someone rated higher. He laughed. I asked him if the win felt easy because of his mental game plan, he said yes and he started to understand where I was going with this particular line of questioning. In this particular tournament he also made it to the finals. I asked him when was the last time that he made it to the finals. He said never. Again he laughed. I summarized, your mental game plan is working, you are winning more matches than you have in a long time and just made it to the finals of a tournament, why is your confidence low? My client (unconsciously expects) wants to start winning every match and final round matches in his tournaments.

Changing goals

Yes of course but in this current moment he’s met his goals and is doing what he needs to be doing to enhance his performance. His mental game plan is showing up in matches and tournaments and is working. He acknowledged that.This happens with physical performance. You master a technique, start winning and expect to always win. Although along with this expectation to always win things start to fall apart.

What does work? He sets new goals and we keep moving him forward toward those goals. It’s not time to abort the ship, feel like his mental game plan is not working, set himself up for outcomes and failures. It’s time to set new goals and continue learning and growing so that he reaches those goals: continuing to win matches leading to more finals leading to winning tournaments.This also happens with physical performance. You initially set goals, reach them, set new goals and develop a game plan for reaching them.

Acknowledge what’s working. Realize you’ve grown. Take notice of your successes. Develop a new plan.

Happy end of the week!

Dr. Michelle

Photo credit: tortagialla.com