Mental Moment-Change Doesn't Always Happen the Way You Think

Mental Moment-Change Doesn’t Always Happen the Way You Think

Posted June 25, 2013

In Coaches, Healthy Lifestyles, Professional & Olympic Athletes

One of my younger clients struggles with confidence. Her lack of confidence shows up as anxiety. Horrible anxiety. What we’ve ascertained is that wanting to perform well (by all others accounts she is very good) is new. She’s never been ‘good’ at a sport before and has not wanted to perform well. This increases the pressure she feels and causes anxiety. This was her minds automatic response to pressure.

Besides not having experienced these feelings before she is shy and introverted which for her means that she spends a lot of time alone studying and reading. She does not have balance. This lack of balance has led her to dumping all of her time and energy into her sport (not only is she good but she feels accepted). This causes the pressure and anxiety to dramatically increase.

We’ve tried making small changes in her coping mechanisms but the overarching issues remain: isolation and lack of balance so change hasn’t stuck because she doesn’t have much else (friends or activities) balancing and diverting energy away from this one thing.

My job always requires quite a bit of creativity but this situation required a little more. Here’s what I came up with. I found out that her coaches were offering summer camps. I suggested to my clients Mom that my client volunteer to help with summer camps. This would get her involved with her sport at a different level and potentially build confidence, leadership skills, provide more balance and build her socialization skills in a safer environment. I also suggested that its not a great idea to push her into doing it and ensure she’s not a lackey but doing important tasks that are going to build her up.

I am happy to announce that my client started volunteering yesterday and apparently liked it. Her Mom said she was chatty when she got in the car. For a shy introvert that is good news. 🙂 It’s a good lesson: change doesn’t always happen the way we think it should.

Happy start to your week!

Dr. Michelle

Photo credit: commons.wikimedia.org

anxiety, balance, change, confidence, socialization, sport

Dr. Michelle Cleere

Dr. Michelle Cleere helps top athletes, musicians, and executives in competitive fields unlock the power of the mind and create the mental toughness to be the best. She gives her clients the mental tools to deal with performance anxiety, gain more confidence, and build resilience. Check out her credentials.